Sunday, July 27, 2003

Tale of the Tape: Tony La Russa vs. Daniel LaRusso



By Ryan Ernst
The Cincinnati Enquirer

It's the professor of the dugout vs. the Karate Kid from Reseda. Who's the top Italian for Top of the Second? Let's go to the tape.

TEENAGE TRIUMPH

Becoming the youngest starting shortstop in the history of the majors.

Edge

TL

Becoming champion of the All-Valley

Tournament

80'S FASHION

Looking like a softball player in the White Sox untucked collared jerseys and shorts.

Edge

DL

Looking like a stud in his fake Members Only jacket.

PATENTED MOVE

Hit and run.

Edge

DL

Get hit, run.

ARCH-RIVAL

Base-throwing Lou Piniella and the Cincinnati Reds.

Edge

TL

Punch-throwing Johnny Lawrence and the Cobra Kai.

KNOWN AS

The winningest active manager in the majors.

Edge

DL

"The best, a-ROUND!"

BULLIED BY

Hall-of-Fame shortstop Ozzie Smith.

Edge

Push

Hall-of-Fame jerk character actor William Zabka.

OPPONENTS WANT TO

Use his over-managing style against him.

Edge

DL

"Get 'em a body bag, yeeeeaaahhh!"

IRONY

Graduated law school just before becoming a manager.

Edge

Push

Learned karate by doing Mr. Miyagi's chores.

CRUSADE

Protecting animals.

Edge

DL

Protecting himself from the ever-impending threat of hooligans with an axe to grind.

DUMPED BY

The White Sox.

Edge

DL

Ali with an I.

MOST EFFECTIVE MOVE

450-foot home runs off the bat of Mark McGwire.

Edge

DL

Crane kick.

PART III

Successful manager of the St. Louis Cardinals.

Edge

TL

Broken punching bag for the Bad Boy of Karate.

Winner: Daniel-San puts Tony in a body bag (7-3). He's the best around. And nothing's gonna ever keep him down.




BENGALS / NFL
Higher goals await Bengals
Bengals Q&A
Ex-Bengal Spikes proclaims Buffalo LB corps the best

REDS
Reds 8, Mets 3
Daugherty: Nuxie not ready to be yanked
Welcome to the world of hurt
Reds Q&A
Encarnacion earns his way back to Chattanooga
Reds chatter
Notebook: Larson shipped back to Louisville

MORE BASEBALL
Murray, Carter ready for Hall
Gary Carter Career Statistics
Eddie Murray Career Statistics
Pirates' dismantling doesn't make sense
Is claim of helping Twins full of hot air?
MLB power ratings
NL: Dessens beats L.A. with one-man show
AL: Benitez blows save, BoSox beat Yanks

PAGE TWO
Sports flicks chock full of characters
Tale of the Tape: Tony La Russa vs. Daniel LaRusso
Enquirer Page Two power rankings

METRO SOFTBALL
'Fly-Man' won't take off Metro

54TH NATIONAL FATHER & SON CLAY COURT TOURNAMENT
Familiarity present at tourney finals

BASKETBALL
Dow: College basketball insider
Search for missing player yields decomposed body
Murky images of Bryant's accuser
Officials investigate threats against DA prosecuting Bryant

HORSE RACING
Stevens balances horses, Hollywood

MOTOR SPORTS
Dow: Auto racing insider
Tracy shakes off penalty to grab Molson Indy pole

GOLF
Mason keeps Sr. British lead

TOUR DE FRANCE
Armstrong's set to join an elite club
Live updates from the AP

ON THE AIR
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