Here's something they didn't teach us in journalism school: If you write a column that ticks off teachers, don't do it right before a snow day that shuts down the schools, so hundreds of steamed teachers can stay home and rap you over the knuckles with e-mail rulers all day long.

I feel like a dunce on double detention, writing a thousand times on the blackboard, "I will never criticize teachers."

After reading my column about the possible strike by Sycamore Schools teachers whose salaries are already among the highest in the state, several teachers invited me to try their jobs out for a day. Sure. I could scare the paste out of kids by teaching them how to sling explosive opinions. I might even accidentally learn something I missed during a 13-year term in K-12 Penitentiary.

Raw outrage

Then again, I did not choose to be a teacher.

One teacher was "outraged" that I called students "raw materials." But compared to what teachers used to call me, that's a compliment.

A few teachers boasted about using my column to teach kids how wrong I was and how rough it is to be a teacher. Poor kids. There oughta be a law against that - it's worse than animal cruelty.

A few were mad enough to spit chalk that I said their contract requires only 185 days of work a year. "A lot don't have the summer off if they are teaching or going to school. Certification is mandatory," Sycamore Education Association President Susan Sauer patiently explained.

Her objection: "We have no question about the money we make. This is about health insurance."

District officials insist that is very generous, too. But Ms. Sauer says, "Feeling valued is more than money. It's how you are treated.''

OK, fair enough. But e-mails from some teachers and most taxpayers said the Sycamore teachers are being treated just fine.

"I appreciate your words on teachers. I enjoy teaching and one of the reasons I got into teaching was because of the schedule," wrote Drew Baker.

"I have the great privilege of being in school every day with my son. ... It is a perk that no one can put a price tag on."

What about the kids?

Karin Langner recalled a teacher strike in seventh grade: "Having one substitute teacher is bad enough. Having all substitute teachers was terrible. It was utter chaos."

"I don't know much about the Sycamore teacher situation, but I will say that schools are to teach children and children should not be put in the middle of these situations. It's confusing and disruptive."

Steve Woodward wrote, "Well, it's about time! I have kind of, sort of watched this thing going on and knew that these teachers were trying to take advantage of a good thing, but after reading your numbers, I am appalled that these people are actually considering a strike. Can you spell S-P-O-I-L-E-D?"

Well, I can't spel too gud, but I kan rite colums that make teechers hot enuf to melt fore intches of snoew just by lookin at it.

E-mail pbronson@enquirer.com or call 768-8301.