Some things we know.

        Some we can only guess.

        We know Bridget Stovall is accused of killing her two children. We know she is 23 years old, a single mother. The children, Cariyan, 4, and Iyan, 20 months, drowned April 7 in a bathtub in their Evanston apartment.

        Neighbors say the children were always well-dressed, the little girl's hair neatly combed. They say Bridget Stovall was quiet, a church-goer. We know she worked as a telemarketer, a cashier and a hospital housekeeper. We know she was alone.

        And one is not enough.

        Frankly, two is not enough sometimes. Children need plenty of adults in their lives. Even parents blessed with everything else — each other, jobs, families — often need help from neighbors and teachers and pastors. And a real but uncomfortable fact of life is that sometimes the parent is a child.

        Or at least not technically an adult.        

Cruel cycle

        My friend, Mary, says adoption is the answer. “We adopt kids, why not parents? Maybe there's some way to match up people who know a lot about being a parent with people who are just learning.”

        In 1998, more than 3,200 teens gave birth in the Tristate. Statistically, these mothers are more likely to be poor and to abuse or neglect their children. We know children who are abused are more likely to grow up abusive.

        We know that from 1997 through 1999, Children's Hospital treated more than 900 children under age 4 for serious injuries. We know 32 of them died.

        Somebody is working on this. Actually a lot of people, including a woman named Judith Van Ginkel, director of a program called Every Child Succeeds. The idea is to help people — especially mothers — be better parents. Her agency hires nurses, social workers and other child-care professionals to give parents a hand, especially parents who are new at it, especially parents who have no one else to ask.

        Sort of a professional adoption, you might say. This program, funded by United Way and some private benefactors, is only two years old, so there's not much data available about its effect. But we already know, don't we? We know that one is not enough and that a well-trained swarm of friendly faces, shoulders to cry on and practical advice is bound to do some good.        

Parent aid kit

        Some visitors will arrive with baskets stocked with safety items, such as cabinet locks, socket plugs, thermometers and smoke detectors. Some will dispense Parent Aid Bags with everything from child care magazines to Kroger coupons to diapers.

        Every Child Succeeds is well-funded and well-managed. Children's Hospital is one of the founding partners, and Dr. Van Ginkel has an impressive and admirable record. They hope to reach 1,200 moms this year. It's a professional, institutional model of something that a lot of us unofficial, unprofessional but experienced neighbors might be able to mimic — keeping an eye out for some young parent who looks like she could use some help.

        We know that for every mother we help, there's the possibility of helping several children. And those children's children.

        And we know last week Bridget Stovall was sent to a mental institution in Columbus for psychiatric help. What might have happened if she'd gotten help of another kind when she was struggling with two little kids?

        We can only guess.

        E-mail Laura at lpulfer@enquirer.com or call 768-8393.

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