Sunday, April 22, 2001
Guidelines for discussing race in Cincinnati
These tips come from Eric Ellis, president and CEO of Integrity Development, a West Chester management consulting firm that performs diversity training nationwide.
For African-Americans
• Initiate discussions with whites. Be willing to talk with them about recent unrest.
• Know yourself. If you know that you may become too upset, tell the other person you'd rather not discuss it at this time.
• Allow white people to make mistakes. Don't give up or prejudge them.
• Avoid becoming angered. Know that the other person's perspective is just as valid as yours — even if he's never walked in your shoes.
• Listen to WLW as well as the WDBZ so that you have additional reference points for how some whites feel. Many callers may anger you, but some of them may give you hope.
• Be willing to teach without always being right. Even though you may be looked to in conversations with some white people to be a teacher, avoid the posture that suggests all of your perspectives are 100 percent correct.
• Prepare others for your passion. Explain upfront that if you express emotion in a discussion, they should not take that as a sign to close down or become afraid.
• Coach yourself to remain calm. Keep talking. Learn to summarize what someone is saying to you as a way of demonstrating understanding and defusing anger and tension that could arise.
For whites
• Avoid over-generalizing. Don't make definitive statements about what black people do or don't do. Start by acknowledging that it is your perception that black people seem to ...
• Avoid blanket criticism of rioters. Recognize that although most African-Americans deplore the violence, some have a belief that things would never change if white people don't experience the pain of racism.
• Seek to understand. Start by saying, "I really would like to learn more about your perspective.'
• Avoid judgmental statements: "I can't believe what those people did.'
• Avoid remarks like, "You people' or "Those people.'
• Ask for feedback if you say something offensive: Explain from the outset that if there is anything that you say that offends someone, he should let you know.
• Avoid disparaging remarks, at the start of a conversation, about local or national black leaders. It's not that you can't criticize African-American leaders; there are many black people who agree. Just don't make that your jumping-off point. It can set a bad tone.
• Avoid topping: Don't insert examples where white people are as discriminated against as blacks, i.e., reverse discrimination. Although it is true that black people have prejudices, you want to avoid making these points just for argument's sake.
For everyone:
• Avoid talking about generalizations and focus on sharing your personal thoughts and feelings.
• Empathize with the other person's perspective even if you don't agree.
• Seek to create a dialogue, not a debate.
• Don't go too deep too quick.
• Avoid personal attacks.
• Don't use words like “always” or “never.” For example, “Why do whites/blacks always ... '
• Try hard to speak honestly and genuinely.
• The more discussions you have across race, the greater the potential for understanding.
• Realize that we all bring prejudices and biases to these discussions.
• Determine that the goal of the discussion is to get understanding.
Differences impede honest discussion
Frank talk across the racial divide
Guidelines for discussing race in Cincinnati
Hard issues are political - and personal
'African-American': pride to some, division to others
Akron program brings groups face-to-face
